Redstate

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Duke University has a Board of Visitors. All major universities do, and the members of that board carry the charge of making sure that the university functions in an ethical, honorable and efficient manner that maximizes the reputation and societal contributions of the university as an institution of higher learning. It only appears to the untrained observer watching The Duke Rape Farce of 2006 that this board is merely a fictitious body of mysterious characters akin to The Illuminati.

The Board of Visitors has a vital role to play in the final unwinding of Mike Nifong’s malicious yuppie hunt because of how the Duke University faculty has deported itself in the matter at hand. One advantage of academia lies in the fact that the individual professor can always retreat from pop culture and current events to explore the esoteric details of their academic discipline. The entire Duke Lacrosse debacle provided the Duke University faculty an excellent opportunity to be above it all and to wisely retreat.

Instead, these intellectual giants decided to care. They elected to care about the behavior of the Duke Lacrosse team in much the same manner that The Council of Islamic Courts decided to care whether Somali militiamen chewed on drugs. Like the mullahs of these aforementioned Islamic Courts, the Duke University Faculty has even started issuing its own unique brand of fatwa. To the embarrassment of Duke as a serious educational institution, 88 members of their faculty actually signed.

Upon the issuance of this “We’re Listening” proclamation, it became time for the Duke Board of Visitors to give these clownish inquisitors an earful. The discussion should have begun with a brief recital of The Bill of Rights. Particular attention should have been paid to the part where defendants brought before the bar of justice are innocent until proven guilty.

Once these budding Einsteins understood the intricacies of the US legal system, the discussion could have then moved to other topics. A rereading of the professional duties of a university educator would certainly fit nicely at this juncture. The Visitors could then mention the employment status of non-tenure signers just to see if the “We’re Listening” crowd was still receiving signal 5X5.

Unfortunately, several factors have inveighed against any mucking of the Augean Stable of faddish stupidity that pollutes the campus of most American universities. The climate on any of these campuses would instantly become about 30˚ Centigrade cooler if the student body not in favor of hanging wealthy, privileged lacrosse players from the goal posts of the rugby pitch were to raise their voices athwart the trendy Left-McCarthyism of politically correct gender politics.

The faculties and administrators of most major universities have gone from in loco parentis to just plain loco. There is no longer any sheriff in town. Authority figures who enforce just and even-handed law are badly out of intellectual vogue. No one flies over the campus cuckoo nest, because the inmates now administer the asylum.

The alumni associations seem not care. It’s worse than that. They are economically invested in making sure the petty details all get swept under the rug. The name on the diploma these alumni received contributes to their economic marketability. This name has a price in terms of graduate salaries that moves up and down based on the academic reputation of the university in question.

If a current employer sees Duke University on a resume and thinks to himself. “Hmm…that’s where drug-addled transvestites burn their S&M toys in public to protest gender oppression in modern America.” That Christmas Bonus the Duke graduate is counting on big time isn’t going to be six digits. The alumni are co-opted and won’t stop feeding the multi-culti beast. Don’t expect a bunch of former graduates to lead the charge against this idiocy.

This leaves the Board of Visitors as the last bastion against the degradation of our modern American university. They are the only people who can pull the plug on this race to the intellectual bottom. They are the last body that stands between the modern University being effective and vivacious as an intellectual climate and the modern university being the wellspring of nothing but profound and mediocre stupidity.

If not at Duke, where? If not because of the faculty turning on three of their own undergraduates in order to curry favor amongst political activists, over what? If not now, when if ever? The time has come for The Duke University Board of Visitors to pay some people a very unpleasant visit.